Toad and the Talking Tree
I used to have a little thread, that I posted on the forums of the guild I belong to, but unfortunately the thread didn't survive the migration to new forums, all except for the title post, "Toad and the Talking Tree." So, I decided to create a new TTT thread there and maybe cross post it here, since it is involved (and involves) the little adventures of my characters both in the past and as an on-going thing now.
-- Ivy the Mage (United We Fight, Atlantic)
Toad decided to go for a hop around town. He'd never actually done that. Always he hoppity-kal-ort-por-hopped whenever he needed to get anywhere. There were many sights to see in the township. Toad really loved some of the houses.
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/9s/1owmw5s66rti.jpg)
Others seemed like perhaps they could use a little work....
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/c5/uklt61kckr4r.jpg)
![Image: https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/dh/d94w4vp03cpq.jpg](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/dh/d94w4vp03cpq.jpg)
Toad learned that as an 'amphibian about town' it wasn't all fun and games when he ran into the Trinsic Swamp Lizardperson Homeowners and Tenants Association. He made the mistake of refusing their pamphlets. It was a mistake you only get to make once.
Fortunately United We Fight is a big guild and a friend is never far away....
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/ne/dm1wvkdmyawo.jpg)
With the lizardmen sorted out Toad got back on his township walkabout/quest/exploration. What did he run into (as I'm sure you by now guessed) but a talking banana tree.
They talked of many things and Toad lost all track of time.
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/bs/42r77r6l09w0.jpg)
Toad got himself slightly turned around ...
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/3a/a6xi6fm0vezo.jpg)
After a few more rather unfortunate albeit mostly painful misadventures ...
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/2o/grw5p7s2hdnk.jpg)
Toad, after many more trials and tribulations and small victories too numerous to document here, finally found his way back to the Library where there was much pre-circa-2014-grand-reopening-based celebration complete with actual rune books and the much anticipated second floor Toad's Tavern, decorated by the fabulous yet magnificent UWF interior decoratrices, Hill People and Belladona!
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/kw/mkdwnigdnw7l.jpg)
-- Ivy the Mage (United We Fight, Atlantic)
Toad and the Talking Tree (circa 2014)
Once upon a time (yesterday) someone (Dragging Canoe) suggested that the new library should have UWF Township books again. Since Ivy was pretty much done studying for her upcoming Applied Necrotoxicology via Vector Calculus Fishing final exam, she felt confident enough to send Toad out to update said books.
So Toad went off on a Kal Ort Por to the guild house where he found the old UWF Township books. They were a little out of date.
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/bb/lji9xbx46tlu.jpg)
Once upon a time (yesterday) someone (Dragging Canoe) suggested that the new library should have UWF Township books again. Since Ivy was pretty much done studying for her upcoming Applied Necrotoxicology via Vector Calculus Fishing final exam, she felt confident enough to send Toad out to update said books.
So Toad went off on a Kal Ort Por to the guild house where he found the old UWF Township books. They were a little out of date.
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/bb/lji9xbx46tlu.jpg)
Toad decided to go for a hop around town. He'd never actually done that. Always he hoppity-kal-ort-por-hopped whenever he needed to get anywhere. There were many sights to see in the township. Toad really loved some of the houses.
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/9s/1owmw5s66rti.jpg)
Others seemed like perhaps they could use a little work....
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/c5/uklt61kckr4r.jpg)
![Image: https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/dh/d94w4vp03cpq.jpg](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/dh/d94w4vp03cpq.jpg)
Toad learned that as an 'amphibian about town' it wasn't all fun and games when he ran into the Trinsic Swamp Lizardperson Homeowners and Tenants Association. He made the mistake of refusing their pamphlets. It was a mistake you only get to make once.
Fortunately United We Fight is a big guild and a friend is never far away....
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/ne/dm1wvkdmyawo.jpg)
With the lizardmen sorted out Toad got back on his township walkabout/quest/exploration. What did he run into (as I'm sure you by now guessed) but a talking banana tree.
They talked of many things and Toad lost all track of time.
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/bs/42r77r6l09w0.jpg)
Toad got himself slightly turned around ...
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/3a/a6xi6fm0vezo.jpg)
After a few more rather unfortunate albeit mostly painful misadventures ...
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/2o/grw5p7s2hdnk.jpg)
Toad, after many more trials and tribulations and small victories too numerous to document here, finally found his way back to the Library where there was much pre-circa-2014-grand-reopening-based celebration complete with actual rune books and the much anticipated second floor Toad's Tavern, decorated by the fabulous yet magnificent UWF interior decoratrices, Hill People and Belladona!
![](https://forum.uo.com/uploads/editor/kw/mkdwnigdnw7l.jpg)
And they lived happily ever after ... until the next update.
Cheers,
Ivy the Mage
2 October 2020
Tagged:
Comments
On that note, I have a little picture that Geks the Goblin took when she was in Destard yesterday trying to get that red, broken sword thingie.
Anyway, Geks told me in her chirping voice that is musical and to my ear sounds quite soothing in a susurrating yet oddly cacophonous way too *laughs brightly with sudden cacophony* that her plan was to follow around people, who clearly were able to deal with the spawn, toss an electrified chicken or two at the odd giant lizard and call it a day (more or less).
The goblin assures me that she completed the quest, but when I went and talked to that drunk (not the one with the purple ale, the other drunk!) guy with the swords I noticed that his hand was bandaged and he started asking me questions about this "little, nasty green piece of work with huge, sharp ears and even sharper teeth who was flying the same guild tag as you and that person over there with the shield who is trying not to fall over."
Needless to say I feigned ignorance about any stolen swords, and made the obligatory quip about 'pots calling the kettle drunk,' calling it a day and beating a hasty Kal Ort Por.
cordially,
Ivy the Mage
6 October 2020
Sabaal's Black Gate Guide
(Note: I have omitted the psuedo-Drowish text of the original manuscript, leaving only the translation. -- ed.)
As some of you, who have been around for a long time, might remember in 2016 or so I came to a permanent cease fire (after the unfortunate episode of being trapped in a bottle) with the "alleged" perpetratrix of the deed, Lymafaekentlarah. As part of the cease fire, Lyma agreed to share her house with me and I would stop making fun of her name and killing the local ice snakes and other wildlife.
Anyway, it all went (and continues to go) pretty well though about half the time I would show up to grab some scrolls or a spell book or something, and there'd be this dark elf, who bears a passing, family resemblance to Lyma but doesn't have much to say and tends to either not like me or needs a set of prescription Mace and Shield Reading Glasses, because she always has this semi-hostile squinting thing going. I've tried telling her it isn't attractive and she'll develop crow's feet in three or four thousand years, but I digress as usual.
I asked Lyma about her and what I was able to get out of her (Lyma) was that the elf's name is Sabaal and she is some sort of young associate, temple guardian, trusted toady, factotum and such and so forth from the "good old days in the underworld," etc. etc., who came along when Lyma joined UWF but managed to keep such a low profile that the other day an emissary made her (Sabaal) come to the guild house and asked, "Who the heck are you, young elf?"
We discussed and the upshot is Lyma thought that letting Sabaal put together her own Black Gate Guide thingie as a sort of appendix to Cinderella's excellent tutorial on the forums might be a good way to introduce her. Since Sabaal doesn't know how to use Windows, I said I would help in return for being allowed to macro my boardgame playing skills (I have an Alacrity scroll for that!) in our shared house. I have no idea why she (Sabaal) insisted upon a translation (I had to crowd source said translation so the less said about that and wherever Sabaal picked up that shocking dialect the better!) since she speaks English almost as good as me, but there it is, there you have it, um, and so with no further adieu ... the quest!
-- Ivy the Mage
SABBAL'S BLACK GATE QUEST GUIDE
Vendui. The first thing you need to do is travel to Julia's Ghost, near Minoc, to get the overall quest. As you can see above, there is a book on the guild house steps. There is also another one in the UWF Library.
Speak to the ghost. She desires you to gather her blood. This "Ghost of Julia" is more real than other haunts for you do not have to be an adept of the Spiritual Talk to speak with her.
Turn into a Banshee and then recall near to the pool of Julia's blood. Gather some and be on your way.
Mariah the Healer of Moonglow requires a bottle of Green or “Compassion Sage” as it is commonly known. She also desires a quantity of fresh ginseng. The quest runebook will have a spot marked for the ginseng, which you just pick up off the ground. As for the Green, you loot that from the packs of red-robed Controllers in Ilshenar. Exodus dungeon is an excellent place to find those worthies. Once you have these items come back and she will give you a book, “An Illumination.” I read it but didn’t find it very illuminating to be honest.
Next you will interrogate one Jaana in Yew. She will desire that you search for an incriminating note hidden under some barrels in a winery. This can be hard to find. Liberal use of magicks, such as “Ctrl-Shift” might be indicated to produce the needful epistle. When you find it, return to Jaana and she will give you a green robe.
Now travel to West Britain and seek out one Iolo. He desires that you assist him in providing for the poor. He particularly seeks shoes, fresh milk, and bread. I highly recommend that you purchase these items from cobblers, provisioners, farmers, and at taverns rather than ripping them from those weaker from yourself. The laws in Britain are such that this is much more expedient and simple. When you have satisfied Iolo with your contributions, he will give you a garish pillow as a reward.
You will find Geoffrey and the Hand of Death in Jhelom. He desires that you go to Destard Dungeon and kill large numbers of drakes and dragons. You can do this and your victims do not need to be in Destard. I’m told that one can even murder one’s own pet greater dragon and I know it is true because I’ve seen it happen with my own eyes.
Another way to fulfill this quest is to offer Geoffrey and his associates the correct bribes and then queue up your whole guild. He will hand out swords as if they were water, albeit broken, red ones. Inferior blades, but they are adequate so that you can continue on your quest.
Next you will want to visit the animated, talking statue of Shamino in Skara Brae. He desires that you recover the ankh amulet from a pile of bones located deep within Hythloth Dungeon. Be warned that this is a very dangerous spot with the potential for close quarters fighting against many demons. Those not wishing to fight or tarry might do well to cast Protection, then recall in and out quickly. Note that according to my sources, the animated statue is perceptive and will not accept a common ankh necklace in place of the lost ranger's. The statue will give you an ankh necklace that you will put with the other rewards you have received up to this point.
You will need to see Katrina at the tailor shop in New Magincia. She is quite a fun, jolly woman as you can see from the picture we took. She desires you to massacre a bunch of troglodytes in the Painted Caves in return for a bundle of shorn wool. Once you do this there is only one more person to see before returning to Julia for your final reward.
Dupree of Trinsic desires that you kill an Unbound Energy Vortex in Shame Dungeon. These elementals are mighty indeed, so you'll want to bring some friends or a powerful beast. Also, remember that being made of energy, the vortex is immune to energy damage. Like repels like.
Once you have destroyed the vortex, return to Dupree and he will give you a commemorative purple mug.
Finally, by the Dark Gods, your quest is complete! Return to Julia with all of the items you have gathered and collect your reward. She will give you a random, decorative stone with a virtue rune inscribed on it. Fittingly, for my many efforts I received a Humility rune. If the Spider Queen favors me perhaps I and my compatriots will collect the entire set.
That is all. Farewell and good luck.
-- Sabaal
{Treasures of the Undead Lords October 2020}
for
Treasure Hunters
Drakelord#5598
In the end, Toad ended up going trick or treating as a gargoyle, the same as last year.